Vulkan

Nice shop in the area. Just a little cramped ..

So you shop

Bad establishments, Series 1 "Volcano Supermarket". What you need to enter this citadel of madness: 1) Glasses (any) 2) 10 kg of ice 3) the Constitution of the Russian Federation 4) Suit without pockets 5) Weapon (required) When you just look towards this store with your naked eye, your eyes will bleed and explode. Therefore, I advise you to take glasses. Within a radius of 5 kilometers, the store is guarded by 33 guards who look like Gollum. Throw the Constitution in their faces, they will look into it and get stuck for a very long time, immersed in reading. Another option: they can kill each other in an attempt to get the book. The very name "Volcano" already speaks for itself: your point will turn into a volcano, which will burn even more than the head of Aida (who is a deity) or the farts of Aida (who is youtuber). Going inside, your anus will be heated to the melting point of titanium. Here ice will come in handy, put everything there is. True, there is a possibility that in a microsecond the ice will not only melt, but also boil. The hole will cool down a little, but right there at the speed of light, a hach-guard (the leader of those 33) will fly into you and kick you out for your existence. But thinking that you are a bum, will let you back. The main thing here is not to contradict suspicious persons, for it may turn out to be a security guard. 34 khacha guards, 4 Chinese janitors, 4 Slavic cashiers, 5 Negro movers and 1 director-dolboy. The army is large, but we can handle it, gentlemen. If you turn out to be a brave fool who dares to steal something from there, the director will call the Russian Guard headed by Shoigu and they will put you in a jail without trial and you will rot there. To prevent this from happening, wear a suit without pockets (you will have to carry money in your hand), because you may be suspected of theft. You can’t talk, laugh or make any sounds in general. And then you reach the checkout, where with a probability of over9000% one of the checkouts will not work, but there is always Arsenchik who will replace Galya at the checkout! You can really get tired of being with a bag or a backpack. The cashiers are evil and scary. A trifle can be thrown (yes, thrown!) Not into the hand, not into this fucking saucer, but into the face, to the side, on the floor, as if it were a smoke or shuriken. But a ninja can defeat either a samurai or another ninja, so grab a katana, nunchucks, or other ninja weapons. Or you can just shoot her with a machine gun. This is how a dialogue might look like if you buy "beer" crackers or an energy drink: -What are you, drunk or what? -No. -Passport, f *** ing, show me! - I don't have it with me. And yes, I'm not buying booze! -So you are also going to buy some booze? Call your parents! - * just look away from the shelf with preziks * -Oh you little ...! Well, or something like that. If you rob the store, then you will be shot on the spot, and when in Hell they ask you what you got there for and you answer, then you will be shot there and you will come back. 4 out of 100 Gollum guards

Not all products have price tags. For example, on fresh packing mushrooms (mushrooms and hangers) they were not

The price tag for the goods on the rack is one, but at the checkout another is punched, at an inflated price